It is only Guruji who removes all ifs and buts from our lives.
I had severe depression with much anxiety. I read dozens of inspirational books, watched motivational videos, attended webinars and took therapies, but nothing could put me at ease. I began taking medication and went for several rounds of counseling. The medication made me numb and I found it difficult to do daily chores. Taking care of my home and my family became arduous.
Depression sounds like just another cliché, but those who have experienced it know how it can sabotage relationships and career. People judge you and abandon you. Only a few understand your trauma and genuinely take care of you. Guruji says those are the real people in your lives.
I saw no hope and was clueless about how to change my state of mind. I was desperate to come out of my depression. I then started going to Bade Mandir to seek help and to request Guruji to show me the right path. As I was oblivious to everything, I could only go because my husband took me. At the Mandir, I would sit crying. Tears would flow while listening to the divine
shabads. I strongly felt they were cleansing karmas accumulated over lifetimes. Guruji was healing me at Bade Mandir.
I also got a copper
lota blessed at the Mandir. The
sewadars initially refused, saying the lota was for people with critical illnesses, but after talking to me for a few seconds they realized how badly I needed it. I knew it was our Guruji Maharaj who wanted me to drink water from the blessed lota. I also opened a channel of communication with Guruji. Instead of talking to people, I began conversing with Guruji. People must have thought I lived in isolation, but it was Guruji's way for me to connect with Him. He knew my journey was not easy and He had to teach me a lot of things, which could happen only without distraction.
I started doing regular
satsangs at home. I followed Guruji's ways of communication through telepathy, satsangs, messages and dreams. Guruji wants us to adhere to his ABC dictum: No abuse, no blame, no criticisms. He promises to protect His
sangat, no matter what. Guruji says: "
Kabhi kisi ki ninda mat karna. Jo tumne jaap aur ache karm kiye hai vo sab zero ho jaate hain." Don't say anything negative about anyone. Do your karma and let them do theirs. Surrender without any apprehension and He will take care of the rest. "
Loka nu apni problems na dasya karo," Guruji said. "
Tussi apna mazaak banande ho". (Do not share your problems; people will make fun of you.) Share your problems with Guruji. Sitting in front of His
swaroop, talk to Him and receive His blessings.
I followed Guruji's words faithfully and began seeing significant changes in myself. My anxiety decreased. I started receiving spiritual guidance on every step.
Instead of worrying about my situation, I began manifesting the belief that Guruji was with me. He will show me the path whenever I would wander, I assured myself. I got Aum
darshans, saw dancing peacocks in dreams, and even did satsangs in dreams. I got the holy Shiva Puran from a devotee when I least expected it. I was amazed. Guruji treated my depression, so I could take care of my duties.
At my lowest low, my husband and I went to a renowned astrologer. My horoscope indicated a life shadowed by depression since a particular planet conjucted with another debilitated planet. The astrologer explained that this led to very bad effects. He suggested I use a remedial stone, which I never wore, as Guruji clearly said no to such things. I realized that with Guruji in my life, I had to bear only 10 percent of our karmic consequences. I cannot imagine how it would be if I have to bear their full brunt. My belief was that
chanting Guruji's name and surrendering totally is the way to change one's destiny for the better. Only a Guru can change your life. It turned out that I was absolutely right.
Talking to people might provide some respite, but it is just temporary. We must seek guidance from our Guruji Maharaj. When our connection with Him strengthens, doors open for spiritual guidance.
Guruji Maharaj's Lotus Feet are like an umbrella for surrendered souls, protecting them from all the miseries of material existence. We offer our respectful obeisance unto His Lotus Feet. I pray to Guruji to bless His sangat and keep us all at his Lotus Feet always.
I didn't plan to write down my satsang, but Guruji has made me do so. Each word I have written is with the grace of our Guruji Maharaj. May all be blessed by Him.
Tani Dhawan, a devotee
October 2020